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Tuesday, November 12, 2024

Turnbuckle BEATdown: Crown Jewel ‘24 In Review

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If weekly WWE TV shows are like single issues of ongoing superhero comics, and monthly premium live events are the bumper issues that close out story arcs, and the big four PLEs are like crossover events… then this year’s Crown Jewel was the inessential “annual” issue with a fill-in artist.

In wrestling terms, this was something of a glorified house show as well as an absolute PR fest. Everything was loosely in keeping with wider ongoing storylines but nothing very important happened. This includes inaugurating the first ever men’s and women’s Crown Jewel champions. With both champions having to leave their belts in The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia and receiving a ceremonial (Dynamite Diamond) ring instead, these titles aren’t going to be defended and will play more like bragging rights at best. Hearing both divisions referred to with reference to gender (rather than “champion” and “women’s champion”) was definitely a plus though.

And on the night, the in-ring wrestling was really nobody’s finest work.


The Bloodline (Solo Sikoa, Jacob Fatu & Tama Tonga) def. Roman Reigns, Jimmy Uso & Jey Uso: Face acting!! It’s still a fresh treat having Roman Reigns back. His face acting is unmatched and plays a substantive part in carrying the wider storyline while navigating the immediacy of the match itself. Sikoa was also excellent here in this regard.

The post-match involvement of one Sami Zayn does move the story forwards, gesturing towards Survivor Series, but the match itself was unremarkable – like a house show headliner, except with the heels going over and getting the win.

“Main Event” Jey Uso coming out last, even over Roman, was great. Michael Cole referring to the new Bloodline as being “like rabid animals” was distinctly un-great (racist).

Women’s Tag Team Championship – Bianca Belair & Jade Cargill (c) def. Damage CTRL (Iyo Sky & Kairi Sane), Meta-Four (Lash Legend & Jakara Jackson), Chelsea Green & Piper Niven: This match went over well with the live crowd and included a few fun spots, but mostly served to tease future collisions. In particular, Cargill and Legend going toe-to-toe and delivering hossfest vibes was excellent. It’s great to see a range of Black women on the WWE roster, each with their own thing going on.

Another commentary note – Corey Graves made a point to highlight that the champs had been keenly anticipating this match even though their odds of winning were lowered by the number of teams participating. Framing Belair and Cargill as complacent would have worked, but instead his angle seemed to be that they aren’t very smart – as though they didn’t recognize the odds or understand the situation. I don’t know, Graves, maybe they just enjoy wrestling?

Seth “Freakin” Rollins def. Bronson Reed: It was positive seeing Bronson Reed get his first marquee singles match in WWE, and this was a solid outing with one of the greatest performers of his generation in Seth Rollins. As in his match with Damian Priest at Money In The Bank, Rollins continues to keep things fresh and largely kept away from his signature move sequences. With all he’s accomplished already, Rollins could be playing the hits at this point but instead he keeps moving – respect. This also played perfectly into the “what will it take to keep Bronson Reed down?” angle that they worked as the in-ring story.

Women’s Crown Jewel Championship – Liv Morgan def. Nia Jax: Heel vs. heel was always going to be an odd sell for crowning a new champion and while this match was defined by storyline shenanigans (yet another halted cash-in attempt from Tiffany Stratton, predictable interference from “Dirty” Dominik Mysterio and Raquel Rodriguez), it’s hard not to be thrilled for Liv Morgan, the performer. She has worked on every aspect of her craft and is now rightly at the center of must-see weekly wrestling TV.

United States Championship – LA Knight (c) def. Andrade, Carmelo Hayes: This bout had the strongest in-ring flow on the night, but it was also fascinating from a “styles clash” perspective. As a triple threat, this match featured two unbelievable in-ring talents, and one guy who is just very over. As ever, Andrade and Hayes really brought the intensity and in-ring innovation, but with Knight amongst them, this match was a much more muted affair than their recent run of excellent singles encounters.

Knight more or less held his own, but this very much felt like two guys pulling off wild and lively spots with a third guy popping up every now and then to do an elbow drop and hit his poses for the crowd. No shade on Knight, just different approaches to the artform. And all in all, a reminder that in WWE, character work is – and has always been – the decisive primary concern.

And as a gentle critical aside, if you slip on the ropes and land on your crotch, the great Sabu reminds us that you have to sell it. When Knight slipped in his run-up-the-ropes spot, he just scrambled back into the spot as though it hadn’t happened, breaking the spell momentarily. Botches happen, it’s what you do with them that counts!!

Men’s Crown Jewel Championship – Cody Rhodes def. Gunther: Another commentary observation – some of Michael Cole’s script on the night was very, very strange. Each of his match intros seemed to include some supremely un-natural copy. He also delivered them in the cadence he uses when he’s doing an ad spot, which maybe tells us something. Hyping up the main event, Cole announced that up next, “an inaugural event will occur between the two most powerful superstars in WWE”. Before the Owens / Orton match that didn’t happen, he said that “Kevin Owens and his personal journey of righteousness will fight The Viper Randy Orton”. Okay.

In any case, Rhodes and Gunther put on a good match. Their in-ring story, Cody having to find a way around Gunther, would have been bolstered by Cody perhaps being more overmatched and taking more punishment – but in a champion vs. champion match, it’s understandably important that everyone goes in and comes out looking strong.

Rhodes getting a crafty win with the Bret Hart sleeper reversal roll-up was a clever way of ensuring a clean finish without Gunther taking any substantive reputational damage.

The Bret Hart Sleeper-Reversal

Curtain Call: If the match between Kevin Owens and Randy Orton had taken place, the card here would have been seven matches – too many for a regular PLE, for my tastes. The bigger problem, though, was that this entire show felt eminently skippable. There’s no doubt the performers connected with the lively live crowd in the moment, but Crown Jewel ultimately came over like a house show with its own one-night-only championship belts.

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